Besser als (Better than) (2012)

BESSER ALS

my friend had a birthday, he stole all 
the candles for a stormy day, i visited
him two weeks later, a year older Paul
told me i should have visited sooner

did i bring the puppy, the music, the food
come sit on the ledge by the window
i put my guitar away, sing if you want
i'll light the candles i saved then

the weather got darker he was busy with
his puppy, nibbled on some cheese, smitten
with good old me doing nothing humming
feeling the evening breeze not hungry

i told Paul
this is better than radio
thank you, thank you
for inviting me
i could sing all evening
watching you and puppy

he was nearby - i sang
the tree branches are scratching
how's that dog growing, does it bark?
it's slow, have you got your collar 
are you ready for my hot fireworks
with your neck and the fleas

my friend staggered
into the dark then came back to me
he brought out his padded leathers
he needed help i didn't care before

he ties tethers to himself don't go
too far from him far enough life's
not fun he gets his exercise at my gymn
thigh for head, hand for shoulder i crush

his poor smile
away better than he can smirk i open
my eyes bigger and put grooves around
that smirk i know exactly how old he is

fortnight assembly
at chez Paul
mandatory

i heard a knock at the door
Paul's friend Doomsy Schneider gathered
apologizing he did not even bring his sticks
saw Paul struggling with the muzzle fit

he told Paul
this is better than the road
thank you, thank you
for including me
i'm so tired i can relax
fitting you in the black harness

that's okay, Doom, there are no zippers
these buckles are double, you pull
tight around the latch, the snaps
i hold the reins if there's any trouble

double was a good idea, twice more
than what he had i wanted, so i grabbed
his shoulder and shoved him down
on his knees, belly on floor, i pressed down

Paul yelped out
You are the worst friend at a time
like this, unlike you do know better
for doing that
you take care of Puppy
i'm not talking anymore

he's left with his harmonica, Till
go after him and the puppy, i have to
open some more windows in here 
i'm so cramped it's dark and stuffy

Paul came back
with beer for both of us and treats
for Schneider, juicy fingerling grapes 
with schnapps, he doesn't drink beer
how awful, nibbly crackers to dip
can anybody be more froo froo dainty

than our drummer
so i'll hug the glass bottle and be plain
or Paul's going to break the light
of the candles with his whip then it's over

let me see
your hands, you need to practice curing first
yourself without me and Puppy, he said he
knows, i drink my beer quietly but for

the rain splashing
into the hallway out front, door wide open
naturally that had to be Richard Kruspe
he paddled in, dripping hair mussy he combed
his hand through it, stomped his boots as if
announcing to the floor it was good enough

he said to Paul
yours is dryer than my place
thank heavens, Paul
we've been needing the rain
where is Puppy and Till, you okay
that has to be Schneider i can hear him

how's your hand, no good for unjamming
the windows, i'll leave the door open
to your big front porch, the flowers are nice
and blooming, you've been working alone

again, not good
not better than
you and I as usual i invited myself
take the medicine i detect a sniffle
these are for your hand you need me
i did not know they knew one another

better than
i've been following Doom's progressions
our adagio is well connected now 
not too many notes in between he cues me
better than he used to and the afterbeat
without rolling the crash on foot basso

i sang to Doom with beer in hand i'm 
not sorry who's sorry, a little pain will 
wake up the blond in Paul and the tooting
will start but his forehead is thicker

than his hand
his is better as he heals
thank you, thank you
Richard, we needed more candles
then i tighten Paul's straps 
or else i yank

you onto or under him and Schneider has a right
foot pedal crook out the back of your leg
so where would you be then when he starts
knocking and pounding, you do not have to horse

and stomp around us
have a beer, you want to hear that awful
harmonica with ripples of insouciant Paul ever
every birthday every century eons and epochs

ever every ever
better than silence
he thinks not either i guarantee you is why
you never show up on time appointed for me

who's that there
the sound is square, Till, it's on the porch
it's not my pooch, Puppy isn't out front this
late, is she, get up from the window you are
sweaty again, the wind goes that way, you have

to trust me
this is my house so much better than 
everywhere we rent every tour i annoint
you back bottom then center, then you shift
to plunge to your right and wrestle me why not
Richard Kruspe bathed in your hot sweat
thick enough to choke that flaming peacock

hey, Paul, tell Schneider to switch with Till 
I'll be right back with Oli that square sound 
that's him, tall, slim, perfectly symmetric
then dry my butt please i'm soppy but modest

there he is - welcome, Oli
better than sans puppy, aaaaww
thank you, thank you
i'll take her from you
Paul needs your height
tonight he's, you know, needlessly

supposing he would kind of want maybe 
to conjecture wind velocity dissipation by
permeable medium until Till is singularly
a puddle greater than how soppy i am, i need

a fresh shirt then a sweater, i'll be back
Paul! a towel for Richard, motivate, c'mon!
everything, skip the socks, get underwear
undershirt, then give him his favorite sarong
tonight he dumps his expensive clothing here
and wears next to nothing but clean and fresh 

Oli thought that was better than
saying more and too much on my part 
so i did not while Schneider munched
then Oli can do more without me he's 
been around the puddle

He goes straight to the laundry nook to
a pile not inside the basket, a flat
empty duffle bag Paul gave him, never
finished moving in or out living for his
closet with hangers and shelves and family
to do half their laundry without him

You sure you don't want any peach schnapps
he's got the gift variety pack - ginger
cinnamon, licorice you have to try it unsweats
you but warms your chest and throat, i want
your permission for your winter birthday
how about a nonsurprise, it takes some time

to get permission to keep a fluffy, lovely
sable silky smooth bright and beautiful
gorgeous noble large feline, you should
feel one of those, touch its coat and scruffy
jaw - a tiger

natural orange stripes
nicer than inbred white ones with criss-crossed
blue eyes and bowed in front paws and slumped
rumps they cannot even stalk living out of a
circus zoo not much better than a lab or hole

in the ceiling 
have you seen figures not normal they contort
they don't fly - where was i?
finish all of Richard's stash, eat some more, savour
chunks of cheese, stack three crackers, grapes
in one palm, no utensils, pluck like a human cat

nothing is palatable to Schneider without bare
white circles, dishes have to be balanced
on poles just to do more with soap later waiting
for the pantry to go down half way he and Flake

the most efficient one on our team the drummer
quicker than his half doubles neater than 
his shoes and shorts he is the industrialist
every whisp of hair dangles from perfection

i thought i was civilized sipping on the beer
another bottle for me, no table between us
Schneider had a side table, he invited me
to get up and move to the smaller dining table
or move the table to the porch
he could wash his ears with the sound of the rain 
so the right side of my head would not throb

how does he do it, how does he go bare chested
adjusting his drums by millimeters but he is
certain the pitch has to behave, it is acting
i do not know which is my saliva and how long
the beer has been clinging to my mouth down
my throat he says it is objective i trick

myself to believe
i am better than he knows
thank you, thank you
for practicing with me i needed to 
that Chick whoever has a sheet
our producer rewrote for me especially

who told me
you can sing about pussy and dick the mic
is a condom i did not give you rubber gloves
you used to have a stand i want to see you
behind it against it with it again to free
your hands but all you do is deer

in headlights eyes big as saucer plates
that's Doom's job this is not a democracy
he has the VIP very important vantage
position I agreed he gets high center 
thunder booming down on you or you go back 
to the clubs with your fishnet stockings 

wandering
in search of blood it's only you, Till
it's the opposite so let them go no more
fleshpot to your left hankering for a 
spanking to your right within half a beer 
bottle's reach the musk and cleavage hanging

heavy drooping
waiting
to bounce off

the floor they
gesticulate better than plumes of fire
out your back what will be in front 
of you by the hundreds and thousands people
did not say the basso from the floor 
is a big step to hop onto unlike Bono of U2 

you know better than that for now the dinghy 
of rubber you get to watch Flake have 
all the fun just on that i'm climbing out 
of the studio to fix the tour producer's 
mistake the muse array goes on vertical columns 
in mid fore in front of the stage a compromise 

if you cannot
live with
the slinky

kickabout stand i am there before you go
out again stay put and compose i know
you do not know what you want to do
i have better than a clue the sound they
need to gather again but in an oval you
eye of the fermata is a job not a sight


   II

better than not having time we wasted none
Oli gave me his pack of flares Schneider
got to climb to put up his chandelier it's
different every time pretty enough to care

i don't like studio samples or robot man
better than Paul's birthday bash what's
the point the only difference is champagne
grown in France squeezed in Germany to lower

the price i get sick every time don't want
breakfast the next morning only his puppy
genius how he thrust the pooch onto me, took 
the leash away the only way i'll take care

of his dog
better than the jumping bean can
thank you, thank you
said Paul to me and Flake and everyone
there surprise we have mail i read mine
already we've been holding back to annoy

our little guitarist leaving him out 
gathering around Flake it was an easy 
conspiracy on the cheap we play cards 
with pictures of Paul or Kirk through

the years a stack of postcards we reply
Rammstein is not a democracy it is
a junta to keep Paul guessing he doesn't
he pleads and begs he does not know

what he had pouring in tons of fan mail
we pick the best out we can guess or he
has no job right back to the East ear glued
to the radio dining on underhertzs sipping

on second hand
smoke more than a chimney needs a forest
guilty, guilty he and Kruspe and me too
what now a mixer we have to have a full time
mixer throughout a new album it's too much
not the price but the real expense on Paul

a coup following is a mess i don't want
to sing so it's Richard's decision i have
to stay behind the other three voted Nein
such was Paul's gift when we gave him

a big rebate
better than Spain's GDP on Euros better than
Russia hauling through the Crimia river
what a ruse he said it was a donation not 
how i count it's a burden to me
or some sort of magick he told me once

but i forgot
all i knew he appointed me to go to work
at some secretary's desk procedures
steps and signatures Schneider did sign
for me and Rammstein so there's three
but not entities a configuration he

separated me out of the band on my own
by over fifty percent where it is not
strictly mine he donated how awful i was
the poorest rock sinking lower to the bottom

quicker than mysterious Paulie the Duckie 
floating atop he duke of delightful delay
on my birthday he said we can
surprise him acquisition or merger all

i know ones
and zeroes then he has dot decimal multiplyer
like a shaving kit i splash his chin
gave Schneider an idea mustachioed lipathon
hideaway this is harder than the old bet
only hair that's harmless for a dancer

my money is not the state he reverses
the coupons he collects from cheaters
they can't xerox concert tickets like
selling data those memories are blurred
by greed new people i did not expect

they can't all squeeze
together better than Germany had
before when the adagio lingered 
i growled over it oh well 
who wants to hear staccatto